TRANSFORMING THE TRADITIONAL INDIAN MARRIAGE
There are several types of questions that one may employ in trying to gain information to assess compatibility. Appropriately using questions during conversations can make a tremendous difference in the amount of information that is shared. An open-ended question is the most effective type of question to ask a person to invite the sharing of information. This allows the speaker to share what he or she feels is important, as opposed to limiting or narrowing the information that is shared. Open-ended questions are perfect to get to know someone and to engage in a positive dialogue. The fol- lowing list provides an example of the types of questions that can be used to gain information as a young Indian adult assesses compatibility of a potential partner in terms of the Hindu faith and culture.
1. Are you a Hindu?
2. Describe how you practice your faith.
3. Do you have a prayer room in your home?
4. How often do you pray?
5. Who is your favorite god or who is your house god?
6. Do you celebrate important Hindu festivals?
7. How often do you visit the temple?
8. Do you observe fasts occasionally?
9. Are you a vegetarian?
10. Does it bother you if others eat meat in your presence?
11. Do you feel comfortable wearing Indian ethnic clothes?
12. Do you have Indian friends?
13. Are you embarrassed when you see Indians speaking in their native tongue?
14. Do you speak your native language?
15. What customs do you observe from your Indian community?
16. Do you enjoy Indian food?
17. What are your most important values?
18. How involved are your parents in your life?
19. How do you identify yourself: as an Indian, American, or both?
20. What challenges, if any, did you face growing up as an Indian?
21. Is it important to you that the Indian culture and the Hindu faith are passed down to your children?
22. Do you watch Indian movies or listen to Indian music?